It's time to grow...

Well, for those of you (I am assuming there are some) who have been following my blog, you know how stressed I have been about this whole moving thing. Yesterday afternoon I got a text (yes, a text message on my cell phone) saying, "What about Hawaii?" My first thought and my reply was, "For vacation?" Afterall, at the time of the text I was knee deep in snow trying to dig my van out AGAIN so I could run errands-- a vacation to Hawaii sounded great; however, I knew that's not what Grady meant. He soon replied, "For 3 years!?!"

At first, this news was exciting and all i could think was--- Warm weather year round, no more layers of clothes, walks on the beach, building sandcastles in the sand, NO MORE SNOW, a real reason to get my butt in shape, a real tan (one that I don't have to pay for), a 3 year long vacation...

Then, it started to all sink in-- Its expensive there (to live, to visit), this WILL be a deploying unit so Grady will deploy and the kids and I will spend months there ALONE without him, its far away from the states... Its not going to be the 3 year vacation I had earlier invisioned...

I questioned whether or not to even go with him... Perhaps just rent a house in Texas and see him when he could get leave or when he was home for R&R... This changes so many things AND at the moment I'm not sure how to wrap my head around it all. Of course, I love and support my husband (to the moon and back) and apart of me wants to go to Hawaii and be just that-- loving and supportive... And the other part of me wants to climb in a hole and not come out until he retires from the Marines...

After talking to a few friends who have been stationed there (they all loved it, btw), I started to put things into prespective and I started to realize who I AM, what my "job" is as his wife and the mother to his children... He chose me because I love him and I support him in his career even if that means moving across the world.

So, Who AM I? I am the glue that holds our family together, the support system that makes us work, the optimistic one, the decision maker (don't always like that one). I am a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a strong person (most of the time), A MILITARY WIFE. 

For so long I have dreamed of having a "normal" life. One where my husband works a 9 to 5 job, we live down the road from our family, we own a home. A life where there wasn't dramatic changes every 3 or 4 years... I guess, in a way, the life I grew up having. 

I realize that THIS is MY life-- I married a Marine and together we have two amazing kids. I agree that this life is tough at times BUT I know God put me in Grady's life for a reason and for that I can't let him down. We will see the world TOGETHER (or at least parts of it) and we will make memories TOGETHER and we will love and support each other when we are apart because that's what we do AND what we have always done! And I like it that way =) 

Revelation 3:8

When God leads you to the edge of the cliff, trust Him fully and let go, only 1 of 2 things will happen, either He'll catch you when you fall, or He'll teach you how to fly!